An open letter to Alex Rodriguez

Dear Mr. Rodriguez:

Congratulations on becoming a free agent! I always knew you were better than the Yankees. The Yankee fans never treated you well, and I laugh that they are so shocked that you would leave. They are delusional in thinking that anyone and everyone in Major League Baseball would want to be a Yankee. I think you seriously did the right thing. They never respected your athletic ability and really didn’t deserve you. You are wise!

And how perfect was it that you announced your free agency during the final game of the World Series! As one who dislikes the Red Sox almost as much as I hate the Yankees, I am thrilled that we get to talk about you today instead of the Red Sox win. What perfect timing! Seriously, I can't thank you enough!

Now, if I may suggest one thing… I think you’d look fantastic in red. And despite an earthquake once in a blue moon, and a wildfire here or there, California is a wonderful place to live and raise a family. I hear the Mrs. Rod is expecting… we have excellent schools here in Southern California and places to take the kids like Disneyland! Something to think about for the future Little Rod. And your children can play baseball year round - how sweet is that? And we have luxurious homes, fantastic malls (of which you are already familiar, because I saw you at Fashion Island once!) and awesome beaches! What more is there to love?

Angels Fans would sincerely appreciate you. We need a third baseman and a big bat badly. If we’d had your help this season, we’d be holding that trophy instead of the Red Sox. Sure, we love Vlady and Garret, but the three of you combined? Unstoppable! And Mike Scocia is an excellent manager - much like Joe Torre. In fact, Torre has openly admitted he respects Scocia. What more could you want? Sure, we might not be able to pay all the millions you got the last time, but I think we may come close. And the Angels play as a team - we won't blame you, or any one player when the chips are down. There is love between the team and the fans – we won’t alienate you and I think you'd fit in well!

So please, Mr. Rodriguez…. please consider signing with the Angels. We'd love for you to be one of us, and we won’t let you down!

Sincerely,
Missing JT Snow